


back to december

by thefangirlslair



Series: bridges of love (My Sasusaku Month 2020) [13]
Category: Naruto, Sasusaku - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Based on a Taylor Swift Song, Drama & Romance, Ex-Lovers AU because that's just my shit, F/M, Implied Sexual Content, One More Chance AU, Suggestive Themes, based on a filipino movie, basha!sakura, coz y not lol, popoy!sasuke
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-28
Updated: 2020-07-28
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:35:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,202
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25562941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thefangirlslair/pseuds/thefangirlslair
Summary: silence ensued; just two former lovers staring at each other with almost a 6-ft distance that separated them, and feeling like a vast ocean was between them instead. sasuke saw sakura's mouth open as if wanting to say something again when his phone rang.he looked down on his phone and his girlfriend's name flashed across the screen, maybe because he didn't reply immediately to her text earlier. he looked back at sakura and he saw the recognition in her eyes as she looked at his hand; that there is someone else now, that it's not her now.
Relationships: Haruno Sakura/Uchiha Sasuke
Series: bridges of love (My Sasusaku Month 2020) [13]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1845319
Comments: 4
Kudos: 25





	back to december

**Author's Note:**

> filo moots where u at?? lol

_**i miss your tan skin, your sweet smile / so good to me, so right / and how you held me in your arms that september night, the first time you ever saw me cry / maybe this is wishful thinking / probably mindless dreaming / but if we loved again, i swear i'd love you right / i'd go back in time and change it but i can't / so if the chain is on your door, i understand** _

_\- back to december, taylor swift (speak now)_

* * *

he must be some sort of masochist for doing it, sasuke thought as he got back to his place, a little damp from the rain outside.

there is no pleasure in working with someone you loved for so long and broke your heart. there is only a slight ache and even masochistic wonderment on what could've been if you hadn't broken up. there is a thin line between being professional and being an idiot, and sasuke feels like he's treading that line.

he should've said no to naruto for pushing through their whole college promise to each other. naruto will inherit his father's business, he will be an engineer, and sakura will be an architect. the blond made them promise to him that if he ever gets married and makes a family, he wanted the two to build his dream house. sasuke and sakura, the lovers who were so in love that time they really believed they will last forever, of course, promised him that they would.

that was 7 years ago, and now the idiot finally came to collect their dues. naruto didn't care that it has been more than a year since he and sakura parted ways. _you made a promise of a lifetime,_ his best friend said. _i will hold both of you to it forever if need be!_

and so there he was a month ago, having a breakfast meeting with his ex and his soon-to-be ex-best friend if he only has a chance, and tried his damnest to strengthen his resolve—he has moved on. he finally moved on from the curve of her bare shoulders, and the width of her smile, and the softness of her green eyes when sakura talked to him after almost a year.

if he will try to backtrack to everything that has happened between the two of them for the past month, there were too many, but their argument yesterday evening takes the cake. he now stood at the foot of his bed, looking at the stain left by their picture on the wall that was there for half a decade, remembering how he desperately scrubbed the hell out of it last night when he got home.

they were simply looking over through the masterplan and argued back and forth regarding designs and materials and timelines until it wasn't about the work that they were fighting about but their past.

/

_"can we at least try to be professional about this?" sasuke asked._

_"i am being professional, sasuke," sakura answered with gritted teeth, her legs moved faster to get away from him._

_he scoffed, "yeah, i can actually see that." he tried to get in front of her to stop her from walking away, "what's made you like that, huh? is it because i declined all your designs earlier?"_

_"nothing. and no, it's not like that."_

_"then what's your problem? sakura, if you don't tell me, i can't fix it."_

_she let out a humorless laugh, "trust me, you don't want to know. besides, you can't fix everything."_

_he touched her arm to stop her altogether, "sakura-"_

_"do you really want to know?" her feet stopped from walking, her voice cracked and her eyes shook from emotions and it made sasuke stop as well. his hand twitched from his initial desire to hold her. "huh, sasuke? do you?"_

_he watched as she continued, "me. i am the problem..." her eyes were looking directly at him and he could not look away. "...because i still hurt even if i don't have the right anymore."_

_her words struck deep in his heart, remembering that he was also hurt when he saw her face from the rearview mirror with karin sitting on the passenger seat the other day. he was hurt because he was familiar with that pained expression—he wore the same face ever since she broke up with him that december night more than a year ago anyway._

_"i wish i could tell you i'm not hurting... because i'm the one who wanted this, right?," she whispered. "i wish i could tell you that i'm happy you, for the both of you... i wish i could... but i can't. i feel like i'm such a bad person because deep inside, i'm still hoping you'd say... it's me... that it's still me." her tears finally fell from her eyes in regret and sasuke felt his heart beat painfully in his chest. "let it be me... please let it be me again," sakura cried._

_he really thought he has moved on, but why was his heart breaking in two again? why was he trying not to cry? why was he fighting his need to gather her fragile form against him and comfort her?_

_sasuke couldn't mask the break in his voice any longer, "i love her." it was with conviction as if making himself believe it as much as he'd like sakura to._

_sakura nodded in understanding and heartbreak, "i know."_

_"she loved me at my worst; you had me at my best," a tear fell from his eyes. "and you threw it all away."_

_she frowned, "is that really what you think, sasuke? i just made a choice."_

_it was his time to nod in agreement, "and you chose to break my heart."_

/

his phone chimed alerting him of a message that woke him to his present. he was still standing at the foot of his bed while he rummaged through his pocket to get his phone and saw a message from karin, his current girlfriend for more than 2 months, asking him if he got home already.

sasuke left his bedroom and was walking towards his kitchen as he typed a response when he heard a small noise from his door. someone was sliding a manila envelope under it and without a shadow of a doubt, he knew who it was.

_sakura._

all his thoughts halted; his reply to karin forgotten. he watched as the light outside cast her shadow under his doorway and the way her shadow lingered for a moment. sasuke held his breath.

he waited for a doorbell ring or a knock, but none ever came. the shadow moved to walk away and his senses were screaming at him to _let her go, let her go idiot, move on._

his body moved faster than his brain and suddenly his door was wide open and there she was.

sakura's body turned in surprise, her eyes wide, "sasuke..."

he drank her in—pink hair a wet mess, rivulets of raindrops traveling from her neck to her clavicle, thin shirt that barely covered her shivering form. the shady light of his apartment complex didn't lessen her beauty. even with the way things went for them, how broken they seem to be until now, she was still so beautiful.

"i thought there was no one at home," she said softly. she sniffed, "i just wanted you to give you the masterplan, i already fixed it. if you have any correction or anything you want to change, you don't have to consult me anymore." she smiled a little as he picked the folder up, "you already know that."

sasuke was out of words to say, struck with how much yearning he feels despite the anger and the pain that still bubble in his chest from what he'd been, and still going, through since she left. in the end, he settled for a small, "thanks."

silence ensued; just two former lovers staring at each other with almost a 6-ft distance that separated them, and feeling like a vast ocean was between them instead. sasuke saw sakura's mouth open as if wanting to say something again when his phone rang.

he looked down on his phone and his girlfriend's name flashed across the screen, maybe because he didn't reply immediately to her text earlier. he looked back at sakura and he saw the recognition in her eyes as she looked at his hand; that there is someone else now, that it's not her now.

his phone stopped ringing and he kept looking at her face until their eyes met. and there it was again, the pain and heartbreak on her face that he saw on the rearview mirror before. she spoke, "i should probably go, it's late and the rain might be worse." her foot moved an inch backward, her eyes screaming goodbye as her lips whispered, "good night, sasuke."

his foot moved forward when his phone rang again for the second time, indicating that karin was calling again, but his eyes are still glued to sakura's retreating form reminding him of when she walked away without looking back that night. it got harder to breathe all of a sudden, remembering that exact scene, so he moved back inside his apartment and hovered his finger on the accept button when he heard his name.

"sasuke," sakura called. his head whipped upwards to look at her again, now looking back at him with tears streaming down her eyes. then she said, "i'm sorry... i'm so sorry, sasuke-kun."

her familiar nickname on him and her broken voice broke his hard resolve and his hand dropped the folder and his phone. sasuke moved on instinct as he watched her cry and cry harder, and all he wanted was to hold her in his arms again.

so he did—he pulled her hard against his chest making her sob even harder, murmured whispered words of comfort on her hair, gripped her onto him as if he never wanted to let go.

"i'm sorry," she repeated, an endless loop of her apologies from what happened to their relationship. and sasuke wanted to say sorry too—about realizing it too late that choosing herself was the best thing she did for the both of them, about the way he handled their relationship in his too strong grip without thinking about her well-being, about being selfish and only thought of what's best for them but not the best for her; but sasuke was never the vocal type.

and so, he moved his face from her hair and kissed her forehead. his lips got reacquainted with her biggest physical insecurity, to her closed lids that cover her lethal weapon, to her cute little button nose he loved to bite, to the corners of her mouth that he used to tease her with. and with the breath that she took away from him all those months ago, his lips found her waiting ones, feeling like he's come home from a long vacation.

he waited for a shove or a slap because this was wrong-- because he has a girlfriend waiting for his reply, because sakura doesn't deserve this; but sakura kissed him back, her lips moving against his, and all reasons disappeared in the air.

they stumbled upon his apartment, their familiarity inside this enclosed space was still there even after more than a year of being apart, so they navigated it safely without detaching their mouths from one another. there was a clash of tongue and teeth, a rustle of clothes being shed, and a moan of heartbreak and pleasure as the night went through.

her eyes still continued to shed her tears as he moved above her, against her, inside her. he kissed them all away, whispering her name, praying this night won't end. sakura pulled him closer with her hands against his back, raking her nails down his back and he groaned as he went harder and faster.

when they came, they came together, as if they're made to be together. in his head, they still are. in hers, they might be. ever the righteous, sakura wept. with an insecurity of a boy, he asked if she regrets it and sakura shook her head no. _i can never regret you, sasuke-kun._

he made love to her again after that. then did it again and again, until he fell asleep feeling her head on his chest. when he woke up, she was gone with only the smell of rain and apples on his pillowcase.

there will be a time for self-pity and shame, there will be a time for asking for forgiveness to karin because of it, there will be a time for him to go back to sakura; but there was also time to heal and forget all the hurt and sadness away. he wanted to be whole and brand new when he comes back to her, and he knew it is not now. that time will come when it's right.

if they love again, he wanted to love her right. until then, he will lay here on his empty bed and mourn the loss of her— _of them_ —one last time.

* * *

_~fin~_


End file.
